February to May

February 12th:

Erin is currently in the ER in an Atlanta hospital. She had a significant episode of coughing up blood that lasted well over 10 minutes. (Started around 10:30pm) Lost a lot of blood and is unconscious, but stable. Tests to follow, along with a likely transfer to another facility in the city. Just pray. #GodIsInControl

February 12th:

February 13th:

CT scan complete, along with a chest x-ray, but the medical team is still unsure whether the blood is coming from the stomach or the lung or a combination of the two. She had additional bouts of coughing up blood, but is now sedated and resting. Blood transfusion is occurring as I write this, with at least one more unit scheduled later this morning. At some point, we're going to move from the ER to the ICU. A transfer to another hospital in the area is still in play, as well. #GodIsInControl

February 13th:

Erin has been moved to the ICU. She is still hooked up to a breathing machine and receiving blood via transfusion. Sedation is helping her rest. CT scan showed fluid in the lungs, but another test is needed to verify it's blood and not pneumonia. There is still a possibility of blood in the stomach, but that requires a consult and a separate test later this morning. This is just craziness. Seven hours ago, she was completely fine. Please pray for some amazing friends of ours, who have already adjusted their Monday to watch our kids. This family trip will be one for the ages! But we rest in this... #GodIsInControl

February 13th:

The doctors have spoken and Erin is going to be life-flighted back to VA sometime today. The hospital is working the logistics. Now I have to work the logistics of getting the rest of us back home. Interesting times!

February 13th:

Enroute to Atlanta-Hartsfield International Airport for flight to VA.

February 13th:

Just landed in Virginia. Enroute to Hospital.

February 13th:

Arrived and checked in at the Inova Fairfax Heart and Vascular Institute. This place is top shelf. Amazing nurses and amazing physicians. The Great Physician has put Erin in very, very capable and competent hands. #GodIsInControl

February 13th:

Huge prayer request: if my numbers look good in 30 minutes I can get extubated! I have been asking for hours...it is MISERABLE to be on a ventilator and awake. Please pray with me! -Erin

February 13th:

Ventilator=Removed!!!! #GodIsInControl

February 13th:

Looking at this picture, you would never really understand what the last 24 hours have been like. #OurGodIsAnAwesomeGod

February 14th:

Sorry for the delayed update, but I had one all prepared this morning...and the Internet connection dropped upon hitting 'post'. #1stWorldProblems

I then ran some errands to prepare our house for guests and the return of our kids, which is why I'm just now getting to my second attempt at said update...

Erin's cardiologist visited us this morning and gave us the way ahead: 1) an echocardiogram to check on her heart (which I have been told was completed earlier this afternoon); 2) a bronchoscopy to potentially identify where the bleeding is coming from (I say potentially because it is nearly impossible to identify the leak after the fact, but there is a chance there is still trace amounts of fresh blood and the point of origin will be identified); and 3) another heart catheterization to check on the coiled aneurysm from last month's procedure.

The bronchoscopy and heart cath may be done as part of one procedure, possibly tomorrow or Thursday. If the blood is still coming from the original aneurysm, a second method to help it clot may be used. The removal of the lower lobe of the left lung is also back on the table as an option. If that aneurysm has been clotted and the blood is coming from another location, then we are in a new scenario entirely. We've already been told Erin is not going home until the location of the bleeding has been identified and corrected. At this point, I am planning on us being at the hospital through the weekend.

Very intense experiences since Sunday night, with a lot of unknowns in the days ahead. I nearly broke down in front of the cardiologist this morning while expressing my thankfulness for his work in getting us back to VA yesterday. I continue to be reminded that we serve and believe in THE LIVING GOD, the One who is bigger than us and our earthly troubles. He has shown Himself again and again over the past 40 hours and I am confident He will remain present as we continue on in this journey...because #GodIsInControl

February 14th:

Heart cath is happening tomorrow, possibly in the morning. Some new developments today that I am not ready to share just yet. It's an aggressive plan, but is contigent on what is discovered during the heart cath.

And so it begins.

#GodIsInControl

February 15th:

Erin has been moved to the cath lab for surgery prep. I was told anywhere from 2-4 hours for the procedure, but that is all dependent on what they find once inside the lung. Initial plan is to take a look at the coiled aneurysm and see if it's still the source of the bleeding. If it is, then they might coil it again or place a stent in the blood vessel alongside the aneurysm, effectively cutting it off as a place for blood to collect. This type of stent would not balloon the vessel, but rather attempt to constrict things back to their normal size, as it has already dilated and may have been a contributing factor to Sunday's episode.

If the aneurysm is not the source of the bleeding, then we move into more aggressive options, such as lobe removal. We have been briefed on a more aggressive option than that, but I will make that known if/when the time comes.

Great team of doctors and nurses. Pray for the lead cardiologist and his team to identify with certainty the source of the bleeding and effectively fix it.

#GodIsInControl

February 15th:

Just got an update. Things apparently turned south. The source of the bleeding was identified and it was the aneurysm in the left lung. There was also a collateral vein connecting the two lungs that was thought to be assisting in the bleeding, but after the cardiologist spent three hours on that, it was determined to be a waste of time (his words).

While the cath was being removed from the left lung, it inadvertently punctured the aneurysm and blood started collecting in the lung very quickly. While the team was stabilizing Erin, the vessel near the aneurysm was capped.

Erin has been moved to the OR for an emergency bronchoscopy to get the blood out of the lung.

Pray for the cardiothoracic surgeon performing the bronchoscopy. I am expecting an update by 3:00p.

#GodIsInControl

February 15th:

Erin has been out of surgery for about 90 minutes. The source of the leak has been identified and corrected. Both lungs remain intact. Praise God. Again and again...just praise God.

I will provide a more complete update later, but for now, I need to decompress.

February 15th:

As mentioned in an earlier post, the source of the bleeding was identified with certainty and it was the aneurysm in the left lung. There was also a collateral vein/artery connecting the two lungs that was thought to be assisting in the bleeding, but after the cardiologist spent several hours on that, it was determined to be a waste of time (his words). He was somewhat upset with himself for spending so much time on it, but it's one of those things where you intend to do something for 10-15 minutes...and that turns into three or four hours. I've been there. I am confident you have, too.

While the cath was being pulled back from the aneurysm to prepare for the dye to be injected (which allows for the team to see where the leak is), it inadvertently punctured the aneurysm (and the airway adjacent to it) and blood started collecting in the lung (eventually spilling into both lungs) very quickly. While the team was stabilizing Erin, the vessel near the aneurysm was capped three times over, effectively removing any blood from reaching the aneurysm again. And that is great, great news.

Because of the punctured aneurysm and the subsequent release of blood into the airway, an emergency bronchoscopy was needed to get the blood out of the lungs. the surgeon was able to remove the blood, while also verifying that no additional blood had reached the airway from any other area of the lung.

So, as it stands right now, the location of the leak has been identified and it has been fixed. All without having to remove either the lower lobe or the entire left lung (which was discussed as a possible option prior to the surgery...and almost became a reality had things gone further south than they were already going).

After seven hours of surgery and a significant scare, Erin is currently sedated and resting. At one point, there were upwards of 20 medical professionals in the room, each one actively involved in getting Erin stabilized. AMAZING. Erin is one of the most resilient people I've ever met. There were three surgeons involved in this procedure today and each one made multiple comments to me about her fight and willpower to get through all the trauma that was going on. My wife is a rock star...and we all witnessed it today.

And through all of this, there is only One who gets the glory...and that is the living God. He truly is the Great Physician, orchestrating events well in advance of when they were to happen. My faith has grown tremendously through this experience. We're certainly not out of the fire yet, but it won't really matter what comes our way because #GodIsInControl ... and I rest in that.

February 16th:
Now the road to recovery begins. Erin is still intubated and, unfortunately, will most likely remain so until tomorrow. The medical team is not quite comfortable with where she is in breathing on her own. When she wakes up, I can guarantee you she is not going to like that news. Her cardiologist is projecting a one week stay, so they can continue to monitor her heart and lungs, given all the trauma over the last 3+ days. It certainly looks like the worst is behind us and that is a testament to God's goodness and sovereignty in our lives. He used three brilliant physicians and a host of support staff in an incredible way yesterday. I don't know where they are in their spiritual walks, but one of my biggest prayers has been for God to use Erin and me this week to make Him known to others. Thankfully, it looks like we get another week to do that. =)

We've got childcare covered through Sunday, but it looks like assistance is needed starting Monday and continuing until Erin is discharged. If you are interested in helping in that area, please either text me or PM me.

Y'all are awesome. Thank you so much for your support and prayers. Such an incredible blessing to see the body of Christ in action.

#GodIsInControl

February 16th:

When we asked the lung doctor what stopped Erin's coughing Sunday night, he pointed up to the ceiling. He said there was no reason why it should've stopped. It was then that we fully understood that God had saved Erin.. Yesterday, when the surgery got complicated and the doctors were contemplating a resection of the lung, God intervened again and made the repair, saving both of her lungs.. God brought glory to Himself not once, but twice in this. I cannot imagine what it would be like to be a doctor and knowing God is using you to save someone's life. Very humbling. Thank you, Lord. May many come to saving faith as a result of this miracle. Praise be to God. (From Beth)

February 17th:

Erin has just been extubated. No more breathing tubes or ventilator! BIG step in the right direction. Pray for slow, deep breaths and big coughs to help get all of the dried blood out of her lungs.

Great start to the day!

#GodIsInControl

February 17th:

God's word in Romans 9:14-18 says: 14 What then shall we say? Is God unjust? Absolutely not! 15 For He says to Moses: “I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion.” 16 So then, it does not depend on man’s desire or effort, but on God’s mercy. 17 For the Scripture says to Pharaoh: “I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display My power in you, and that My name might be proclaimed in all the earth.” 18 Therefore God has mercy on whom He wants to have mercy, and He hardens whom He wants to harden. God brought this passage to my mind this morning. Thank you, merciful, compassionate Father. May your power and your might be proclaimed in the lives of the Barricklow family.  (From Beth)

February 17th:

Will you please join us in praying for sleep? I'm having a really hard time falling asleep/sleeping (1st night not sedated). It's a mix of lots of coughing, breathing discomfort, noisy hospital, and frustratingly enough, anxiety. -Erin

February 18th:

As if this week hasn't been eventful enough, now the car in the hospital garage won't start. So, if any of our NOVA friends happen to have a mechanic friend who would be willing to come to the hospital and run a quick diagnostic, that would be a huge help. I would just like to know what the issue is before I have to get it towed and get a rental car. On that note, if anyone has a spare vehicle they're not planning on using for a week or two and would be willing to let us borrow, I certainly won't say no. =)

#GodIsInControl

February 18th:

Erin has moved from the ICU to the Step Down Unit (SDU), which is another step in the right direction. Her cardiologist came by today and really just encouraged her to manage her expectations and plan on this recovery taking a good bit longer than she may have originally thought. It's been a good day, though. Very thankful to the Father for the progress she is making each day. She is still really, really weak, but we are moving forward.

Now that I've had a few days to reflect on all that has happened since Sunday, it's really just amazing to see how God has specifically moved in this situation. For instance:

MIRACLE #1: Sunday night in Georgia. Erin is totally fine. We're hanging out with some friends at their house. Suddenly, she feels blood coming up her throat and runs to the kitchen sink. This is the fifth episode since November 2013 (just a couple of weeks before Jordan was born). Seriously, the amount of blood she was coughing up was impressive and it was coming out of her mouth and nose. About two minutes in, I realize this is not going to end well or anytime soon and I ask her if she wants me to call 911. Yes. EMTs show up a few minutes later and get to work. She passes out in my arms, then comes to briefly while they move her to the stretcher. Ambulance ride to the local hospital is brief, but she is already unconscious upon arrival. For no reason other than God made it so, the blood clots in Erin's lung and she is stabilized. I'm quite confident had He not done that, Erin would have had organ failure because her lungs were filling with too much blood too quickly.

MIRACLE #2: Wednesday morning in Virginia. The heart cath is underway to identify the cause of the bleeding and correct it. When the lead anesthesiologist uses the phrase "volcanic eruption" to describe to me the rate that the blood was entering the airway once the aneurysm had been punctured, you know that is not a good sign. Thankfully, God gave her the foresight to place a balloon in the main airway of each lung in the event this happened, which blocked the blood in the left lung from spilling over into the right lung. When the cardiologist tells me things were "catastrophic", that Erin was "minutes from massive organ failure", and that an ECMO team was on standby in the room had they not gotten the bleeding under control and stabilized her, I have a new appreciation for how God was working in those tense moments.

The reality is that Erin could have easily died on two separate occasions in a 72 hour period. The other reality is that God saved her life each time. What a testimony to the living God and His sovereignty, witnessing His compassion on Erin, to sustain her life because He felt that in life, she would bring Him more glory than in death. And He can do that because He is the Most High God and the Creator of all things. There is no one and no thing greater than Him. His decisions are always righteous and designed with the sole purpose of bringing glory to Himself. What a privilege it is to be called His child and to watch Him work in our lives. O how He loves us!

Erin and I know full well this journey is not nearing its end. There is a long road ahead and we recognize that, because of her defect and the way her heart and lungs developed in the womb, there is a possibility another aneurysm could develop in the future. We all pray that will never happen again, but it could. Thankfully, He has placed us in an area with amazingly talented doctors who will be watching very carefully.

As Christians, we are not promised an easy and pain-free life. In fact, Jesus promises the complete opposite in John 16:33, when He says, "I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart, I have overcome the world." Erin's favorite verse this year is John 10:10, which has become incredibly relevant to her now. In it, Jesus says, "...I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." Life. Not an easy life, but surely an abundant one.

Take heart for He has overcome the world. Beautiful. #GodIsInControl

February 19th:

Pretty sure a shower never felt so good! Praising the Father for the small things today. #GloryToGod

February 19th:

I got a good bit more sleep last night! Mostly anxiety free! I also get to shower today (first time in a week!) so I know that will help even more for a nap and then tonight. I also ate some soup last night...well some is generous, but it stayed in. Still liquids only while my throat heals more...hopefully I can eat enough to build up some strength today. I think I slept for 4-5 hours last night added up, so we're going the right direction! -Erin

February 20th:

Erin has been cleared for a regular diet. Lunch is served! A little taste of the South: BBQ pulled chicken sandwich, mac & cheese, and peach dessert.

February 21st:
Erin is getting stronger each day. She has been on her feet and moving around more easily today. Praising God for His strength!

But the Lord said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

Whether in Erin's physical weakness or my emotional weakness as we continue on this journey, the Most High's promise remains the same: through the power of Christ Jesus, we are strong even when we are weak. Amen.

February 21st:

Now this is Erin's idea of recovery!!

February 21st:

How I am doing: Pro-Con list style:

Pro: Had a test with nuclearmed this morning testing the blood flow to my lungs, all is good! Everything is moving just as it should (and NOT moving where it shouldn't!)

Pro: Visited with my 2 favorite Cardiologists this morning and they both agree, I can have complete peace of mind...this is FIXED. We have our new baselines now we know exactly what we're watching and we fully expect minimal to gradual change over long periods of time.

Con: I am realizing that 3 of the 4 things I was wearing last Sunday night (that were cut off by EMTS) were my favorites. Carin, you already helped me fix one of them before haha....and Robyn, Marie and my other Ft. Leonard Wood PWOC ladies (2008) my Seeking the Redeemer's Feet shirt... :( and my favorite leggings of all time... sniff. (silly I know)

Pro: I did 6 stairs today with Physical Therapy!!

Con: I thought I was going never get my heart rate down, and I basically took a 30 minute nap immediately afterward.

Pro: I finally got off oxygen!! I had been hovering on the OK line for 3 days never quite able to get over it.

Pro: I've been on real food again for 24 hours!

Pro: I'm mainly wire free...only 2 IVs left (I've had 18 since I've been here...8 at one time)

Con: My whole body is one giant odd colored bruise.

Pro: I've had 2 nights of 7 hours of sleep!

Con: I still can't stay awake (or sit up) for long periods of time.

Pro: I have my voice back.

Con: My throat is still the most pain I have by far...and it's going to take more time to heal. Yay.

Pro: Looks like I'll get released Thursday or Friday!

Con: I have about 20% energy right now.

And now I'm going to take another nap :)

Love you all, so so so so SO SO grateful for you and your prayers! -Erin

February 23rd:

Last test complete, and pending results....I can go home TODAY!!!! -Erin

February 23rd:

Home.

February 27th:

I was almost asleep when I remembered I hadn't updated y'all as I had intended today! I'm feeling a tiny bit better, I think I was on my feet for about an hour or a little more today. My body (legs especially) still feels as if I just finished a marathon, energy less and a smidge unstable. I am down to 1 nap during the day. And have been sleeping soundly at night, praise God! I'm creeping slower than slowly back normal, but moving forward nonetheless. And also, my voice is almost back to normal....75% probably. Thank you for your prayers! ❤ ❤ Goodnight! -Erin

March 6th:

Hey everyone! Thank you for your continued prayers! I'm starting to feel better bit by bit. Still painstakingly slow, but better. :) I still "nap" most days (as in several hours of sleeping). And I'm having a fairly easy time falling and staying asleep at night. A few prayer requests:

1. That sleeping would continue to go well. I still have some periods of anxiety that are hard at night.

2. That I would internally continue to heal-lungs, muscle strength, my bruised up arms, throat, voice, etc.

THANK YOU! We love you!  -Erin

March 18th:

After week one "on my own"...all those times people have asked me "how do you do it?!" I'm now asking that of myself!! And believe me the bar was already low and now it's 50% lower (or even lower hahaha). My answer was always, "Jesus, and I started with just 1, then had 2, then 3, then 4....practice!" Well, now I feel like I went from 0 to 4...life is going 100 miles an hour and I have a governor set at 65. My body is SORE, and I am TIRED. I am so thankful for the couple of hours friends could give me each day. Life giving naps for me, and outside time for the kids!

My Wednesday appointment didn't give any new information, I guess an office visit is required to authorize a test they want me to do. So I got some blood drawn and that was it. That test will be in 2 weeks. Coming up this week is my follow up with my cardiologist on Thursday.

Y'all, we have been so blessed by you! Let me just mention a few things...my kids got haircuts, the girls got their toes and fingernails painted, we got Girl Scout cookies, meals every night for over a MONTH!!, Josh got a much deserved man's night out, the kids have more new games than they could ever play, our medical bills that have been processed so far have been covered, our kids got adorable new Easter outfits, our house cleaned, we have been encouraged deeply by those who have come by to pray, send us Scripture, notes, hugs...a million things! -Erin

March 23rd:

My Cardiology appointment today went really well! A few highlights...I am still pretty anemic, still below normal hemoglobin and hematocrit levels, I've lost a little weight, and I have at least 5 doctors appointments/tests on the calendar for the next month. I feel like I've taken a couple steps backwards the last few days, but he told me I would probably experience that feeling a few more times before all is back to normal.

Here are a couple of specific healing prayer requests:

1. That my blood levels would return to normal quickly so my energy can return, too.

2. I still am having some problems with my voice. It gets tired quickly, it's raspy, sometimes my voice is nearly gone by the end of the day or it's painful to talk. I still have difficulty with anything in a higher register (or anything that requires a lot of breath) such as cheering (I know, but I do a lot of this! haha), laughing, singing...etc. Since it's been about 5 weeks, we're nearing the end of a healing time frame, not quite there yet, but it wouldn't be surprising if I had some vocal cord damage...which can be permanent.

3. Something kind of silly but would help is drinking more water...I am terrible at this. Intentions are great but then my drink is in a room I'm not in, or it's drained by a kid, or spilled. Anyhoo...pray for my mind to prioritize this!

4. I still have the post-anesthesia brain fog happening big time, it's really frustrating. I can't remember things, I forget things mid sentence, I have a really hard time focusing and organizing thoughts ((It's taken me 45 minutes to get this written!))

5. I'm having some allergy issues...the dry/irritation cough is not helping my throat and vocal cords finish healing. I would like to avoid taking allergy meds if possible!

The Praise God news:

My heart is looking great.

Another just awesome God thing is that God planned last month's ordeal perfectly (who's surprised). My cardiologist is only required to work 2 weeks a year in the hospital (since he works for an affiliated highly specialized physicians group)- and wouldn't you know it, the Monday that the hospital in ATL called to tell him about me was his first day of his hospital week. Otherwise I would have only seen him after his clinic day was over (and only the days when he was at the clinic close to the hospital!), and been seen by another of his partners during my stay. And, 2 days after I was discharged was his long planned 2 week vacation out of the country! **Also, the thoracic surgeon that did my broncoscopy also was going to leave town Thurs-Sun and introduced me to one of his partners that was to do my broncoscopy...but then due to the emergency during my heart cath (on Wednesday) he was there to do it himself!**

My next appointment is Tuesday- it's a blood (platelet) study. Most of you know I had a lot of problems at the end of Jordan's pregnancy with bleeding, and then all these episodes happened so they are going to do some testing to see why my platelets sometimes act a little funny.

Wow this is long. Love you all!!   Thank you for your prayers! We are so thankful for your support! -Erin

April 10th: 

An update coming after Wednesday! Repeat CT scan today, pulmonology test Wednesday!! 

April 13th:

Thank you for being patient! My CT scan went well. My pulmonology appointment didn't go as expected. I got all good news regarding my CT scan, and my recovery so far (Praise God!), but they didn't do any lung function tests like I was expecting. My cardiologist called today and confirmed the CT scan results. He said I probably wouldn't need another CT scan for another year. :) He is going to follow up with pulmonology and get the tests done. My energy level is back to normal, my exhaustion level is back to normal ;) , I have a 2 more appointments in the next couple weeks (and a redo pulm. appointment to do the tests) and I will have all the new baseline information to establish an appropriate care plan for the future! At some point I do hope to post another video with a visual update! -Erin

April 21st:
Dear Erin- Hello, I'm ***** from the Henry county fire dept. Myself and 2 other medics transported you to the hospital a few months back when you had your bleeding episode. I'm not trying to intrude on your privacy by any means! Me and my partner on the ambulance had no idea if you survived or not once you were in the care of the hospital... you were unconscious and we were breathing for you using a bag mask and you had lost a unforgiving amount of blood! We never heard anything on your status but it has been weighing on my mind for some reason because we hate to work as hard as we can and still lose a pt to their condition. But if your doing well I will pass the good news on to my partner. Thank you, *****

April 27th:

My "final" follow up appointment with my cardiologist was on Monday. It went really well! He mentioned several times that his anxiety level is significantly lower now hahaha😂😂! Mine, too! The tricky part about the plan from here forward is that there isn't a care precedence for patients like me. There truly aren't many other 35+ year survivors of my heart defect. Even so we feel relatively comfortable about where I am, and thankfully due to my incredibly smart medical team we mildly know what to expect (well, as well as anyone can "predict" the future). There are many things to balance (one of them being, surprisingly, my exposure to radiation since the only clear ways to see what they need to see are Flow Scans, CT Scans, MRIs and xrays...all of which I've had several of in the last few months😳). My next appointment is in September. And, since I know Who DOES know the future, I feel good about that! I do have a few limitations that are now for life: no extreme exercise (this significantly changes my life goals ;) ), no medications that act as blood thinners, and I've got to keep up with flu and pneumonia vaccinations. My heart valve replacement is still not immediately necessary so that's great, and other areas of my lungs that are considered "aneuysmic" are documented and will be watched. Every effort will be made in future care to preserve as much of my lungs as possible as we have discovered how compromised they are (another side effect to the heart defect) and removal of any problem areas has to be an absolutely last ditch effort. -Erin